Many of us have had an experience with a grandparent or parent that currently suffers or has suffered from a memory disease like Alzheimer's. These diseases can really hurt the emotions of the care givers taking care of the parent suffering with this disease because they may not even remember who you are. It is important to maintain love and respect for them as you begin to feel angry for your parents inability to act normally. Rather than lying to them to get them to eat and go to the bathroom create tricks that are manipulative in an ethical way. Consider putting their favorite painting in the bathroom to coax them into the restroom to look at it. Consider placing their favorite vice at the dinner table to coax them in to dinner.
Cruel and unusual Alzheimer's care is the normal way of doing things for many care givers. Unfortunately people sometimes default to the less human methods of care giving when dealing with Alzheimer's patients because they do not see the humanity inside. Although people with dementia and Alzheimer's are out of their mind they still have feelings, emotions, and a need for respect. Rather than lying to them about the things that matter to them the most simply use tricks instead with a thread of truth. For instance, although you know your parent does not want to come eat dinner you could mention what is for desert to get them there even though you will get them to eat their healthy food first.
For a small woman trying to bathe a large overweight parent this manipulation may be the only means by which they can save their back as more physical care might have been needed otherwise. Some people just do not have the strength to carry or force a loved one into a bath. By using words carefully you can avoid outright manipulation but still accomplish the same goals. For instance, next time a bath is needed instead of lying about a visitor try placing something in the bathroom they like and coax them in with this being a prize. So in the bathroom you could have their favorite comb, a book or picture. Show them the picture by the bath and talk about it while disrobing them for their shower or bath. You can be tricky without being downright mean.
There are no clear cut rules regarding what is manipulation and lying when you are taking care of someone with memory disease. These elderly people need to be convinced in the easiest way possible b the care giver to make life easy for all involved. You do not want to place unneeded stress on the one taking care of the elderly or the Alzheimer's patient. Try your best to treat the person like you would want to be treated and make sure you do not allow yourself to become frustrated and take out your anger on an elderly person that simply no longer has control of their mind. You are the responsible party in all of this and so it is up o you to conduct yourself appropriately even though the elder parent will not remember and no one else is watching.
Finally don't think you are lying when you trick a person with Alzheimer's to come into the bathroom for a tooth brushing. They don't know it has been a week since the last time they picked up a tooth brush but you do. You see you are working within their make believe mind that cannot remember too much of anything. In this Alzheimer's world you are simply trying to communicate at their level in a way they can understand but you do it in an ethical caring way.
Cruel and unusual Alzheimer's care is the normal way of doing things for many care givers. Unfortunately people sometimes default to the less human methods of care giving when dealing with Alzheimer's patients because they do not see the humanity inside. Although people with dementia and Alzheimer's are out of their mind they still have feelings, emotions, and a need for respect. Rather than lying to them about the things that matter to them the most simply use tricks instead with a thread of truth. For instance, although you know your parent does not want to come eat dinner you could mention what is for desert to get them there even though you will get them to eat their healthy food first.
For a small woman trying to bathe a large overweight parent this manipulation may be the only means by which they can save their back as more physical care might have been needed otherwise. Some people just do not have the strength to carry or force a loved one into a bath. By using words carefully you can avoid outright manipulation but still accomplish the same goals. For instance, next time a bath is needed instead of lying about a visitor try placing something in the bathroom they like and coax them in with this being a prize. So in the bathroom you could have their favorite comb, a book or picture. Show them the picture by the bath and talk about it while disrobing them for their shower or bath. You can be tricky without being downright mean.
There are no clear cut rules regarding what is manipulation and lying when you are taking care of someone with memory disease. These elderly people need to be convinced in the easiest way possible b the care giver to make life easy for all involved. You do not want to place unneeded stress on the one taking care of the elderly or the Alzheimer's patient. Try your best to treat the person like you would want to be treated and make sure you do not allow yourself to become frustrated and take out your anger on an elderly person that simply no longer has control of their mind. You are the responsible party in all of this and so it is up o you to conduct yourself appropriately even though the elder parent will not remember and no one else is watching.
Finally don't think you are lying when you trick a person with Alzheimer's to come into the bathroom for a tooth brushing. They don't know it has been a week since the last time they picked up a tooth brush but you do. You see you are working within their make believe mind that cannot remember too much of anything. In this Alzheimer's world you are simply trying to communicate at their level in a way they can understand but you do it in an ethical caring way.
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Before you assist the disabled with Alzheimer's possibly speak with an organization that can teach you the proper way to take care of your loved one. The Alzheimers Fund is used to help educate and be there for people working with this disease in one way or another.