How To Console Some One Who Has Lost A Loved One

By Winston Dunbar


You can say some things to comfort someone who has lost a loved one. You must frame your words carefully so that you do not sound mechanical and formal. You must come across as a genuine person who wants to help them. There are several things which you can do for them such as helping to arrange the funeral or taking care of pets and kids. You could also help them with daily household chores and preparing hot home cooked meals. Here are the ten things to say to someone who has lost a loved one.

Keep your words simple and direct. Don't use lengthy sentences which might make you sound artificial. If you want to sound genuine and supportive then utter simple words that touch the heart.

Offer support and encouragement. Tell your friend that you are there to help him and support him. Your support is very much needed in this very difficult and unfortunate time.

Say that you are there to help with the household chores. Offering practical help is the most meaningful, thoughtful and a welcome gesture from anyone especially at this difficult juncture of one's life. Say that you can drop casseroles, help with the laundry or pick up dry cleaning, drop the kids off to school or pick them up, water the plants and so on. The list of household tasks is extensive and your grieving friend would be grateful for all the help offered.

Say that you have been praying for that person and thinking about them. These simple words can make the person feel that he is not alone and someone is still there to care for him.

Talk about the deceased person. If you invoke happy memories of the deceased by saying what a wonderful and compassionate he or she was, your grieving friend would start conversing with you about their time with the loved one who has passed away. Share the happy thoughts with the friend who is grieving and their heart would fill with warmth at the thoughts of the dear departed.

Listen attentively and sympathetically. Instead of offering platitudes you need to listen with attention and offer soothing words. The person who has lost a loved one wants to share the thoughts about the loved one who is no more in their life. If you listen with care and patience, it would greatly benefit the grieving friend.

Follow up with your offer of help and support. Keep meeting the friend from time to time and more frequently in the early days when the wound is still quite fresh and not yet healed. If you meet him and help with a chore then your friend would be really thankful.

Remember to call regularly and catch with their life. If you are living at a far off place and it is not possible for you to visit his house as frequently as you wish, at least keep in touch via the phone. Talk to the person about how they are coping and how is life in general. Talking is much better than sending an e-mail which seems more mechanical, impersonal and formal. Your kind voice helps a sad person a lot.

Recreate happy memories and fun times. Take your friend to places which hold special memories for them. He can get a lot of peace and comfort and feel that the loved one is still with them if they do the same things they used to enjoy doing with the deceased.

Say that no matter what you would be always there for them and keep in touch with them and if they need anything they know who to call. This kind of solid and unconditional support comes from the deep bond you share with your friend. Your friend would know that you can be relied upon, leaned on and trusted and this is the biggest gift and support which you can give to your friend in need. This belief is greater and more significant than any other offering.




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